May 25, 2008

"We've got socialisation covered"

Found this yesterday while looking for info to pass on to family members

Published: Sunday, Aug. 28, 2005 10:23 p.m. MDT, Deseret News

When my wife and I mention we are strongly considering home-schooling our children, we are without fail asked, "But what about socialization?" Fortunately, we found a way our kids can receive the same socialization that government schools provide.

On Mondays and Wednesdays, I will personally corner my son in the bathroom, give him a wedgie and take his lunch money. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, my wife will make sure to tease our children for not being in the "in" crowd, taking special care to poke fun of any physical abnormalities.

Fridays will be "Fad and Peer Pressure Day." We will all compete to see who has the coolest toys, most expensive clothes and the loudest, fastest and most dangerous car.

Every day, my wife and I will adhere to a routine of cursing and swearing in the hallways and mentioning our weekend exploits with alcohol and immorality. If our kids attempt to use the bathroom without permission, we will punish them immediately.

And we have asked them to report us to the authorities in the event we mention God or try to bring up morals and values.

Alan Brymer

No comments:

Newer Post Older Post Home